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<p style="text-align:center;">The Pirate Captain talked a good fight (largely on the subject of what he'd do with various internal organs of mine when he got hold of me - clearly not realising it is many years since I had any). But I snuffed him out with a few well aimed cannon balls then set a course for Zarok's Lair. I hope! This armour plays havoc with navigational equipment. I think it has its own magnetic field.</p> | <p style="text-align:center;">The Pirate Captain talked a good fight (largely on the subject of what he'd do with various internal organs of mine when he got hold of me - clearly not realising it is many years since I had any). But I snuffed him out with a few well aimed cannon balls then set a course for Zarok's Lair. I hope! This armour plays havoc with navigational equipment. I think it has its own magnetic field.</p> | ||
<h5 style="text-align:center;">THE FINAL ENCOUNTER</h5> | |||
<p style="text-align:center;">And so I came face to face with The Big Z Inevitably, he was on a balcony - he's always loved a big entrance. Although I suppose, with the size of his outfits, he needs one.</p> | |||
<p style="text-align:center;">But what's this? Oh, not the old "first ye shall fight ye my whatsisfaces and my doo-dads" nonsense. Why do evil villains ALWAYS do this? He wants me to fight Lord Kardok first. Okay, hoofs-for-hands Let's get it on!</p> | |||
<p style="text-align:center;">Lord Kardok, like the golems before him, is no more. Your powers were weak, old man. And so on.</p> | |||
<p style="text-align:center;">An army of Fazguls now rise against me. I finally find a use for that Anubis Stone thing. Somewhat impressively, I use it to evoke my own undead army - the fallen heroes from the Battle of Gallowmere! I'm not ashamed to reveal that the sight of my old friends brought a tear to my eye Or maybe it was the smell - I think some of my former comrades may have been "on the turn".</p> | |||
<p style="text-align:center;">The Fazguls, too, are rendered unto dust. It's lucky I'm not asthmatic.</p> | |||
<p style="text-align:center;">I know what's going to happen now I just bet he turns himself into some kind of horrible monstrous form I just hope it's not a snake. I can't stand snakes. Be a buffalo. Be a buffalo.</p> | |||
<p style="text-align:center;">It's a snake.</p> | |||
<p style="text-align:center;">I beat the giant snake! I beat the giant snake! Look, there's bits of it all over the place - it's like a clearance sale at a giant snake manufacturers… hang on. Zarok's back. He's turning into his humanoid form again… uh-oh.</p> | |||
<p style="text-align:center;">Cool! A piece of masonry crushed him to death! I'll never say a bad word about cowboy builders again. What's more, Al-Zalam has now been freed from my skull. Now I know how migraine sufferers feel in those advertising parchments.</p> | |||
<p style="text-align:center;">Well, that was spectacular. The whole place just collapsed. I only got out by the skin of my misaligned teeth. I must stop having these near-death experiences. The stress is bound to shorten one's lifespan. Hang on… there's a logic I've missed there somewhere… I'm undead… near-death… ohhh, never mind. Anyway Fortress Cross-Dresser - along with its long-term inhabitant - is no more, and that's the main thing.</p> | |||
<p style="text-align:center;">At last I can rest. How I have longed to return once more to that state of peaceful slumber called death. I have proved myself as a hero, and will hopefully be welcomed into the Hall of Heroes with the other great warriors of legend. Or at least not openly mocked.</p> | |||
<p style="text-align:center;">The trouble is, I won't exactly be able to pop back and fill in a last journal entry to let you know either way, will I. Or will I? Well… There's only one way to find out.</p> | |||
====Book 7 - RELICS AND ARTIFACTS==== | ====Book 7 - RELICS AND ARTIFACTS==== | ||
<p style="text-align:center;">Each artifact you collect on your adventures will be added to this book.</p> | <p style="text-align:center;">Each artifact you collect on your adventures will be added to this book.</p> | ||
<h5 style="text-align:center;">WITCHES' TALISMAN</h5> | <h5 style="text-align:center;">WITCHES' TALISMAN</h5> | ||
<p style="text-align:right;">This sought after pentagonal relic offers up a unique and convenient way to summon a witch. The owner will no longer need to perform an animal sacrifice or utilise a loud hailer to secure an immediate appointment with a crone. They can simply present this talisman at the nearest bubbling cauldron, and hey presto; a hag will appear!</p> | <p style="text-align:right;">This sought after pentagonal relic offers up a unique and convenient way to summon a witch. The owner will no longer need to perform an animal sacrifice or utilise a loud hailer to secure an immediate appointment with a crone. They can simply present this talisman at the nearest bubbling cauldron, and hey presto; a hag will appear!</p> | ||
<h5 style="text-align:center;">STAIN GLASS KEY</h5> | <h5 style="text-align:center;">STAIN GLASS KEY</h5> | ||
<p style="text-align:right;">The only way to escape Gallowmere's Necropolis is through the Stain Glass Demon gate, but alas its beautifully rendered glass key is guarded by the Demon of Hilltop Mausoleum. Getting hold of the key is only half the problem though, as the gates keyhole has been magically transported to a secret location!</p> | <p style="text-align:right;">The only way to escape Gallowmere's Necropolis is through the Stain Glass Demon gate, but alas its beautifully rendered glass key is guarded by the Demon of Hilltop Mausoleum. Getting hold of the key is only half the problem though, as the gates keyhole has been magically transported to a secret location!</p> | ||
<h5 style="text-align:center;">ANUBIS STONE</h5> | <h5 style="text-align:center;">ANUBIS STONE</h5> | ||
<p style="text-align:right;">This gold encrusted gem is fashioned in the image of a Nubian sand beetle. Zarok used its ancient power to create and nurture an undead army at the battle of Gallowmere. After the wizard was defeated, the stone was split into 4 pieces and dispersed for safe keeping to the four corners of the realm. Legend tells that if the stone were ever reassembled to its singular form, the mighty power of re-animation and healing would once again pulse through its crystalline structure.</p> | <p style="text-align:right;">This gold encrusted gem is fashioned in the image of a Nubian sand beetle. Zarok used its ancient power to create and nurture an undead army at the battle of Gallowmere. After the wizard was defeated, the stone was split into 4 pieces and dispersed for safe keeping to the four corners of the realm. Legend tells that if the stone were ever reassembled to its singular form, the mighty power of re-animation and healing would once again pulse through its crystalline structure.</p> | ||
<h5 style="text-align:center;">FOREST KEY | |||
<h5 style="text-align:center;">FOREST KEY | |||
<p style="text-align:right;">The forest key is woven from bewitched twigs and may be used to open the imposing gates to the Enchanted Forest. The portly Mayor of Sleeping Village always carries this key about his person, so as to protect the forest from unwanted questors.</p> | <p style="text-align:right;">The forest key is woven from bewitched twigs and may be used to open the imposing gates to the Enchanted Forest. The portly Mayor of Sleeping Village always carries this key about his person, so as to protect the forest from unwanted questors.</p> | ||
<h5 style="text-align:center;">SHADOW DEMON CLAW</h5> | <h5 style="text-align:center;">SHADOW DEMON CLAW</h5> | ||
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<p style="text-align:right;">This fabled combat suit is fashioned from the finest dragon scales, its stylish lines making even the most handsome of knights considerably more dashing and debonair. More importantly perhaps, it grants the wearer total protection from heat, and offers up the enviable ability to breathe a plume of deathly fire at disagreeable types.</p> | <p style="text-align:right;">This fabled combat suit is fashioned from the finest dragon scales, its stylish lines making even the most handsome of knights considerably more dashing and debonair. More importantly perhaps, it grants the wearer total protection from heat, and offers up the enviable ability to breathe a plume of deathly fire at disagreeable types.</p> | ||
====Book 8 - AN ADVENTURE'S GUIDE TO MONSTERS==== | ====Book 8 - AN ADVENTURE'S GUIDE TO MONSTERS==== | ||
<p style="text-align:center;">Each creature you meet on your adventures will be added to this book.</p> | |||
<h5 style="text-align:center;">ZOMBIES</h5> | <h5 style="text-align:center;">ZOMBIES</h5> |